I Want What's Best, Even If It's Hard To Wait For

On Sunday, I was listening to the pastor preach about God directing our steps and then I heard the song, "Walk on Water" by Britt Nicole. As I listened to these lyrics, I wondered, "How am I supposed to tell the difference between waiting for the Lord's leading and waiting because I'm afraid to step out?" I mean, in my own life, I have no direction yet from the Lord as to where to go or what to do, but I'm questioning whether it's because He hasn't spoken or it's because I'm afraid to take a step out of my boat where I'm comfortable. Even as I write this, I'm wondering, "What am I so afraid of?" I don't know. All the "what if's" come and skate around in my head.

Especially, what if it's something I kinda want to do just to show everyone that I can do it, that I can "be something". But this would bring glory to myself and not to God, defeating my purpose of living for God's glory, not my own. I think God wants me to learn to be content in ALL things...including "being" me and whatever he leads me to, and remembering that it's not what I do or don't do that gives me value. I thought I'd learned this lesson before, but apparently not entirely.

Today, I'm clinging to Isaiah 48:17 - "This is what the Lords says - your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: 'I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.'" God is teaching me what is best for me - only He knows what's truly best for me. What I think is best might only be God's good, and I want God's best, nothing else. So I need to learn from Him what's best for ME, not anyone else...ME. I think when I learn that "Father knows best", He will begin to direct my steps in the way I should go and doors will open that I never thought could possibly open, reminding me that with God, all things are possible (Luke 1:37).

What Now, Lord?

Never in my life have I been so, shall we say, clueless. I mean, I really have no idea what to do with my life. I've graduated with my Biology degree and I'm asking God, "Now what?" But I have yet to get an answer. Everytime I look at job announcements and think about putting in my resume for different things - from lab techs to administrative assistants - I get so overwhelmed and just so unsure of what will happen. I know God desires that I trust him completely - with the known and the unknowns of life. But just because I know that's what He wants and is the right thing to do, it doesn't make it any easier to do.

God has also revealed to me, now more than ever, that I am called to ministry, but how and where and when and what??? I don't know that either.
Before my college semester ended, I knew that I would have a summer of trusting God and getting to know him more intimately. Now I'm smack in the middle of this time in my life, just waiting to hear his voice and follow his lead. While I'm waiting, I am getting involved in as much ministry as possible this summer. I'm leading worship at my church on Wednesday nights every other week, I'm helping out with Sidewalk Sunday School and VBS, and I'm helping out in the office as well. I really love doing anything ministry-oriented and I'm excited about these things this summer.

So even though I may not see the big picture, I can see little snapshots that evidence God's working in and through me to accomplish his plan for my life. I know it's a good plan, to give me hope and a future (Jer. 29:11). I stand on his promise that he is always with me (Heb. 13:5) and he will guide my steps.

My question for you today is this: What are you waiting on God to do in your life? Don't give up trusting in him. God is never late, but always on time. Faith is the vehicle by which we get from where we are to where we want to be. Have faith today: the best is yet to come!

What's next?

I graduated from UMBC on Monday, May 24th. I sat at my Commencement and soaked it all in, thoroughly enjoying my graduation day. As I sat there, listening to the valedictorian and President Hrabrowski, I realized that I was about to embark on a new season of my life, one that did not involve college (for now). This is hard for me to imagine, since I have always been enrolled in some form of academia for the last 20 years of my life.

So what does this new season hold for me? Many people ask me what my plans are, now that I've graduated. To be honest, I don't know. Although I may not know what my future holds, I know who holds my future. I am taking this summer and dedicating it to the Lord to hear what His plans are for me. I want to do what the Lord wants me to do, and I have not yet received any clear direction. I'm waiting on God and trusting that He has a good plan for me, one that is full of hope and good things (Jeremiah 29:11). I trust that He will open doors for me to walk through and close the doors that aren't for me. This isn't always easy. I'm holding to God's Word, especially Psalm 143:8-11, which says:
8 Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning,
for I am trusting you.
Show me where to walk,
for I give myself to you.
9 Rescue me from my enemies, Lord;
I run to you to hide me.
10 Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God.
May your gracious Spirit lead me forward
on a firm footing. 11 For the glory of your name, O Lord, preserve my life.
Because of your faithfulness, bring me out of this distress

My question for you is this: Are you waiting on the Lord and trusting Him to lead you?

If so, keep waiting and trust in His perfect timing. His plans for you are good!

Live your Life!!

Life is to be lived actively, not passively. Too many people just exist and let their life pass them by, often without even realizing it. I've been there. But I reached a point in my life where I realized I was not living the life I wanted to be living, the life I had envisioned for myself. I wasn't happy, and I had no peace or direction. I made a decision to change. And my life hasn't been the same. I surrendered everything to Jesus. I now walk in His strength, and I have joy that surpasses happiness because it's not dependent on my circumstances. I have peace and a renewed sense of purpose and direction.

Jesus said in John 10:10 "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." I have that life! And I am living it to the full! As I share my life with you, my readers, I hope that you will come to have this life and live it to the full. I hope you can find encouragement, not only from my past, but also from my future; and may you find strength to make the changes necessary to live the life you want to live. Don't live passively. You only have one life to live - so live it!

My question for you is this: Are you living the life you want to be living?

If not, do something about it!